Leasons Learned

The damndable thing about learning "one of life's many lessons" is that often times it was something that you knew before you ever made the mistake. We knew that the oven was hot long before we ever touched it as a child. And it hurts so much when we have to make the mistake in order to learn because it tears down our pride and exposes some of our most embarassing vulnerabilities.

Please Remember...

Time, sometimes the time just slips away
And your left with yesterday
Left with the memories
I, I’ll always think of you and smile
And be happy for the time
I had you with me
Though we go our seperate ways
I won’t forget so don’t forget
The memories we made

Please remember, please remember
I was there for you
And you were there for me
Please remember, our time together
The time was yours and mine
While we were wild and free
Please remember, please remember me

Goodbye, there’s just no sadder word to say
And it’s sad to walk away
With just the memories
Who’s to know what might have been
We’ll leave behind a life and time
We’ll never know again

Please remember, please remember
I was there for you
And you were there for me
And remember, please remember me

Please remember, please remember
I was there for you
And you were there for me
Please remember, our time together
The time was yours and mine
While we were wild and free
Then remember, please remember me

And how we laugh and how we smile
And how this world was yours and mine
And how a dream was out of reach
I stood by you, you stood by me
We took each day and made it shine
We wrote our names across the sky
We ride so fast, we ride so free
I had you and you had me

Please remember, please remember

Measure of a man...

When I think of what I want in a significant other I often stump myself. I mean it is hard to draw out the details, because if you do that you run the risk of never finding what you are looking for. However if you just live your life and go down the road of your choosing perhaps along that road you will find exactly what you never knew you wanted. I know of the general qualities that I would like to see in someone that I could spend my life with, and I know alot of the bigger things that I want out of that life spent with them. However, what I dont know is who that person is, or where I will ever find them.

People often tell me that I am young and still have a lot of time to figure these things out. But, what if I want the future to start now. Life isnt that long, and we only live once. Why should we let ourselves get caught up in immaturity and youth and continue to push of the real goals of our future till a later time. I don't think that the idea of giving up ones youth to start their adult life too early is a bad thing. I know that when I find the right person for me I will regret not having found them sooner, because I will wish to have spent all the time that I could with them. And perhaps timing does matter. If you find the right one at the wrong time it may not work, but I would like to think that I could find someone now, and that would be the person with whom I spend the rest of my life.

The politics of truth...

I have always had a vision of what makes a great political leader, and never have I seen those qualities exibited in one of our elected officials. I for one desire office one day, not for the power and personal gain that that can provide, though those are nice compliments of the job. I desire the position so that I can serve it as I feel it needs to be served. No leaders take time out of there week to visit with constituents. No leaders take visits to the far corners of their district. No leaders really feel the effect of the legislation that they vote on every day. It is tough for me to see elected leaders trying to say that they relate to those that they represent when in reality they don't. I hope to hold office one of these days because I believe that the right things to do are not that hard. I believe good leadership is simple so long as you find the right leader.

I see America today as a nation that is in dier straits. I believe that we are setting ourselves up for disaster and the general public is just sitting back and letting it happen. However I do not believe that we are too far gone. The politics of hope and change can prevail, if their foot soilders will continue to take the battle to the streets. The apathy of the American people can be overcome if you just get the right people to fight it. I hope one day a leader is elected that can do for this country exactly what it needs to be done. This would not only be good for our country, but it may be exactly what we need to turn around.

The one that got away...

I made my mistakes, this much I know, but the long and short of it is, the current situation was never in my hands. No matter what may or may not have happened over time, the inevitable truth is that departure was inevitable. That factor of the equation was the one over which I never had control. And though there is no good reason to stay, the point is you could have, and that is something that you, not I will always have to deal with.

Life

If you spend a whole life achieving all manner of personal success, but never find the person you wish to share it all with, was your life really worth living? As for me, I would be more than willing to sacrifice everything I ever hoped and dreamed of to spend my life with the right person, however the burden is first on them to make the first sacrifice.

I have never really known exactly what I want in a significant other. I suppose that is perhaps a good thing. If you know exactly what it is you want, then you will never get it. However if you wait and let your heart tell you when it is right then I believe you will truly find happiness.

I have always been very impatient in this regard. If you asked me two years ago I would have told you that I was ready to find the person that I wanted to settle down with. I just see life as a very short thing, and I know that once I find that special someone (if I ever do) I will regret all of the time that I didn’t spend with them. The problem with today’s society, is everyone is so busy in there early twenties. There is no time to settle down because peoples lives are so hectic and are in a state of constant change. It gets so frustrating, but perhaps I should realize that maybe that is how it is meant to be. Maybe patience truly is the virtue that I need to adopt.

Then, I consider the mistakes I have made. I try to think of myself as a very mature person, but some of the things I have done in the past year show that I am anything but. I would like to think that perhaps they were just things that could be expected, and I shouldn’t be so hard on myself, but I set my standards where I do for a reason and there is never a good reason to deviate from them. Maybe the reason I have not found someone to be with is because I myself am way to immature for that. Maybe I have given off the outward perception that I couldn’t handel such a commitment. I would love to think that I could, but in order to do that I have to become as strong a person as I envision myself as being.

I know not what the future holds for me. There is promise, but it will only become what I make of it. I look with eager anticipation and morbid fear as I amble further into my future each day.

Maturity

I had reached a point in my life where I thought I was so much more mature than those around me. I suppose I could have realized at the time that that was a very pompous attitude to have. And perhaps just when it was at its height it came crashing down with a serious reality check.

We all make mistakes, and making a mistake in and of itself does not constitute some level of immaturity. However when you look at your mistake and see that it was such an immature thing to do then you know that perhaps you werent where you should have been. I had that realization here a while back.

Now I am at a loss. I would like to say that it was a one time deal and I can count on it never to happen again. I do truly believe that to be the case. But how can I justify that claim. I know in my heart what I will do, but how can expect others to believe that I am anything more that just another immature teenager. I suppose part of maturity comes when you learn to live with the mistakes that you make. Perhaps there is nothing you can do to make people forget them, but you must also realize that there is nothing you can do to change them. As for me, I have always felt that there is no need to dwell on those things that you cant change. You need to extract whatever lesson can be learned from them and then move on.